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AttachmentTypes and Implications from Childhood to Adulthood

Writer's picture: dr.ssa Elizabeth Mooredr.ssa Elizabeth Moore
Jan 74 min read

A joyful child running through a meadow, with a young girl and an adult in the background, symbolising secure attachment and a nurturing environment."

Introduction

The concept of attachment is fundamental to understanding human relationships. Attachment describes the emotional bond formed during the first two years of life between a child and their primary caregiver (often a parent, usually the mother), shaping their interactions throughout life.This article explores the different types of attachment (secure and insecure), the stages of development, the behavioural differences in children and adults with various attachment styles, and how secure attachment can be promoted.


Types of Attachment

According to attachment theory (developed by John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth), there are four main types of attachment:

  1. Secure Attachment

    • Children: Children with secure attachment trust their caregivers and feel comfortable exploring their environment. When caregivers are present, they feel protected; when caregivers leave, they may show distress but are quickly comforted upon their return.

    • Adults: Adults with secure attachment are independent and confident in relationships. They communicate their needs and desires effectively, maintain stable and loving relationships, handle conflicts constructively, and are open to discussing issues without fearing rejection.

  2. Anxious-Ambivalent Attachment

    • Children: These children often appear "clingy" towards their parents, showing anxiety when separated (e.g., during drop-off at nursery). They may exhibit attention-seeking behaviours and express distress overtly while sometimes reacting angrily when their needs are not met.

    • Adults: These individuals constantly seek reassurance in romantic relationships, fearing abandonment. They may seem jealous or overly needy, struggle to establish balanced relationships, and often display controlling behaviours like over-checking messages or becoming anxious about lack of communication.

  3. Avoidant Attachment

    • Children: These children tend to avoid contact with their parents and may appear indifferent when parents leave or return. They show little emotion and seem self-reliant.

    • Adults: Adults with avoidant attachment struggle to express emotions and intimacy in relationships. They avoid situations requiring emotional vulnerability, keep emotional distance from partners, and may dismiss or minimise conflicts instead of addressing them.

  4. Disorganised Attachment

    • Children: These children display confused or contradictory behaviours towards caregivers, such as approaching them and suddenly freezing or withdrawing out of fear.

    • Adults: Adults with disorganised attachment often have a history of trauma or abuse, leading to dysfunctional behaviours in relationships. They oscillate between anxiety and avoidance, making it hard to form stable emotional bonds. They may be drawn to intense and conflict-filled relationships while fearing intimacy, creating a cycle of push-pull dynamics.


Attachment Development and Parental Behaviour

Attachment begins to form in early childhood, especially within the first 12 months. Early experiences with caregivers, particularly mothers, are crucial in determining a child's attachment style.

  1. Parenting and Secure Attachment

  2. Parents of securely attached children are sensitive, responsive, and available. They balance care and independence, providing consistent and timely responses to their child's needs. They validate the child’s emotions, offering comfort and understanding. This environment fosters trust, encouraging the child to explore the world confidently while knowing they have a secure base to return to.

  3. Parenting and Anxious-Ambivalent Attachment

    Parents are inconsistent, sometimes available and affectionate but distant or unpredictable at other times. This behaviour confuses the child, who cannot rely on the caregiver’s support.

  4. Parenting and Avoidant Attachment

    Parents often display emotional coldness or dismiss the child’s emotional needs, encouraging independence over emotional connection.

  5. Parenting and Disorganised Attachment

    Parents may be abusive, neglectful, or unpredictable, creating a fearful and unstable environment for the child.


Promoting Secure Attachment

  1. Be Responsive and Available: Respond consistently to a child's emotional cues, fostering trust and support.

  2. Encourage Communication: Teach children to express emotions and concerns openly.

  3. Establish Routines: Provide stability and predictability to reinforce a sense of security.

  4. Teach Emotional Skills: Help children identify and manage their emotions.

  5. Model Healthy Behaviours: Demonstrate constructive conflict resolution and emotional expression.


Therapy for Insecure Attachment

Adults with insecure attachment styles face challenges in relationships, but therapy can help them build secure attachments.

  1. Attachment Education: Understand attachment styles and their impact on relationships. Reflecting on past experiences can highlight dysfunctional patterns.

  2. Relational Skills: Learn assertive communication, conflict resolution, and emotional intimacy.

  3. Self-Awareness Development: Use mindfulness to recognise and regulate emotions and responses in relationships.

  4. Address Abandonment Fears: Work on vulnerability and emotional risk-taking to overcome fears of rejection or abandonment.


Conclusion

Understanding attachment types and their implications improves interpersonal relationships and mental well-being. Investing in secure attachment during childhood promotes long-term emotional health and stable adult relationships.


Written by

Dr Elizabeth Moore, Psychologist

(consultation only in Italian)

 

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Consultations are available in Italian only

 

Bibliography


  • Bowlby, J. (1988), "A Secure Base: Parent-Child Attachment and Healthy Human Development", Basic Books.

  • Ainsworth, M. D. S., Blehar, M. C., Waters, E., & Wall, S. (1978), "Patterns of Attachment: A Psychological Study of the Strange Situation", Erlbaum.

  • Main, M., & Solomon, J. (1990), "Procedures for identifying infants as disorganized/disoriented during the Ainsworth Strange Situation", in "Attachment in the Preschool Years", University of Chicago Press.


External resources

If you wish to explore the topic of psychological manipulation further and find relevant articles and studies, consider these important academic and institutional resources.


  1. American Psychological Association (APA) Link: APA


  2. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry Link: Giornale di psicologia e psichiatria infantile


  3. International Journal of Behavioral Development Link: [International Journal of Behavioral Development](https://journals.sagepub.com)


  4. Child Development Link: [Child Development](https://srcd.onlinelibrary.wiley.com)


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